Sunday, 24 April 2011

Easter Eggs are not enough!

The expectations of every child


The expectations of every child
To be held in love, all the time
To know safety with every touch
These are the ways we need, it's not so much...

These are the gifts,that life on earth is meant to bring

The expectations of every child,
Acceptance, gentle guidance with a smile,
Honest answers to their questions of life,
Space to grow, fully assured and bright.

The expectations of every child,
To find a safe place to learn in good time
So that the child knows and trusts the heart
Then grows the child in confidence, that is the art..

The expectation of every child,
To know the family, to feel the line
Of ancient stories, and harmonies
The child is born to know that she is free.

The expectation of every child,
To be respected all the time,
To be chosen with the highest love,
So honour the child you hold, that will be enough.....

These are the gifts that life on earth is meant to bring
Do you bring the gifts? Do we bring the gifts?


Here's the video

You can download this song for free (all my recordings are open source, creative commons licensed) from my Reverbnation Music Page....

I wrote this song about 21 years ago, and it is the basis of all my work since that time. It was inspired by John Holt, Alice Miller, Carl Rogers and by my daughter and her mother, and by Nurturant Mothering in and of itself. 

It arose out of my own adverse childhood experience and the realisation, late in life, that that experience was entirely avoidable, and is one that I and many others have suffered needlessly. 

It also is true to say that the future of 'Civilised Humanity' lies in the extent to which we, as indivduals and as a society, are willing to act and behave and respond with Empathy towarda our children, towards all children, and with that, a degree of self-empathy, a willingness to honestly  reflect on the realities of our own childhoods is a necessary, though perhaps uncomfortable discipline.

I urge all who read my work to spread this insight. There is much work to be done, and we can have a lot fo fun doing it!

Kindest regards


Do what you love, it's Your Gift to Universe

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Wednesday, 20 April 2011

Cardinal Sean Brady, Father Brendan Smyth and the Royal Wedding!

To the Editor,

Cardinal Sean Brady, the Irish Primate, has been officially invited to attend the wedding of Prince William Windsor and Kate Midleton as an honoured geust.

Cardinal Sean Brady was one of three priests who failed to report incidents of brutal sex abuse on children, by Fr Brendan Smyth, to Civil Authorities.

The victims, young catholic boys in their teens at the time of the signing, met with the then Fr Brady in 1975, and were manipulated into signing an oath of silence, on pain of excommunication.

Brendan Smyth went on to assault and harm many, many more children. His abuse was permitted by the Church for 40 years.

He could have been stopped; instead, he was protected by the Church Hierarchy. Brady was following orders.

It's accepted that that was not the only time that Cardinal Brady engaged in such action. The Murphy report said as much.

Brady claimed he was 'too ill' to attend the Murphy Inquiry for questioning. How convenient! How crass! How cruel!

There will be vociferous, angry and necessary protests, by the many Irish Survivors living in Britain, if this invitation is not revoked.

If he does attend, then he must be arrested for crimes against humanity and extradited to The Hague, to appear before the International Criminal Court.

This invitation of this criminal and unrepentant cleric, who has committed crimes against humanity, by his direct involvement in the cover-up of many cases of pedophilia and brutality, in the protection of criminal pedophiles, over many decades, besmirches the Royal Wedding, wounds survivors and sends a clear message that his behaviour is acceptable to the British Monarchy, and the British Establishment.


Corneilius Crowley (A Survivor)

Sent today to all British and Irish Mainstream Newspapers

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Tuesday, 19 April 2011

A Nurturant Society

A Nurturant Society

In considering the fundamentals of a Nurturant Society, one has to define the ground upon which one stands.

If that is not taken in hand, and clearly defined, then it is inevitable that the ‘revolution’, as many are calling it, by positing an ‘alternative way’ to the status quo or by adopting a position of resistance to that status quo, is to a greater extent defined within the frame of reference of the status quo. It is a response to something : that something defines the response. It is a reaction.

Thus it was with Marx, and with many others. They did not see the trap they laid for themselves by talking in terms of production, ownership, and control, which are the terms and structural processes that the oppressive Society uses to exert it's power over people and the habitat. Transferring those to the workers does not change the nature of the Society as radically as people believed, it still permits the current dominant systemic mindset of control of nature as a resource to exploit. Thus the fundamental dynamic and psyche of Power remains, with a merely a change in the Actors and their behaviour towards each other within that set of structural processes. Kinder to one another,  yet damaging to the environment, the shared habitat.

And of course, it has to be said, Marx was a man of his times, and lacked the data we have today about neuroscience, endocrinology, psychological and evolutionary development and the reality of natural empathy. A lack accurate information can lead to the invention of theory out of rudimentary thinking that is without the appropriate evidence. Marx was rightly concerned with human suffering that he knew could be avoided. 

The Nurturant Society avoids that predicament by defining itself on it’s own clear terms.

The Nurturant Society is a fundamentally simple concept.

To Nurture, as a biological process, and as in human action, is to improve the conditions of the habitat or the environment within which life occurs. This process can be observed by anyone who is careful and honest in their explorations of nature. Henry David Thoreau made this abundantly clear in his work during the 1800s, as did Rudloph Steiner (Biodynamics) and Bill Mollison (Permaculture). These three are sequential in that their lives began as one ended and they form one example of continuous thread of exploration of nature that is free of the lens of what I call Empire Logic, the 'struggle for survival' etc etc. All these people and others who were and  their contemporaries looked beyond the Herbert Spenser doctrine of struggle for survival, of civilisation as the apex of natural biological evolution.

To Nurture is to provide both space and materials for life to flourish.

To Parent? Perhaps. However, the word Parent is itself troublesome, for it contains meanings that are to do with control. Control always inhibits emergence. Parental Control implies a mistrust of the child. Control is often a question of fear.

The etymology of Parent.

"to trim by cutting close," early 14c., from O.Fr. parer "arrange, prepare, trim," from L. parare "make ready," related to parere "produce, bring forth, give birth to,"

Thus Parenting has to be redefined or qualified. Natural Parenting or Nurturant Parenting better describes this new paradigm.

Nurturant Parenting then, is fundamentally about facilitating the emergent, about recognising the innate desire and ability of the natural child to learn, to master his or her self, to develop life skills, to be able to meet his or her own needs, and with that the needs of others, as an empathically alive human being, in essence to contribute to his or her family, community, society environment such that all may thrive.

All of which is diametrically opposed to the concept and awareness of the consumer, whose concern lies solely with consumption.*

And, because human life does not occur in a vacuum, but rather takes place in a continuum, in a non-linear web of activity that is typified by connection and interdependency, it follows that when life is nurtured, it is nurtured for all life.

Thus Natural Parenting is an activity that is not exclusive to the biological parents, but includes the entire community. "It takes a village to raise a child." And a forest. No community exists independent of the habitat.

Everything is food. There is no waste.

This can only be achieved by each element with the biological process web being it’s true self, having it’s own needs met. It is therefore a question of meeting inherent needs. Nature is a web of intersecting needs being met. Algae make oxygen. Bacteria eat all kinds of materials and transform them into their bodies, which are eaten. They also produced 'waste' which is not waste, but is in reality food. Plants take in Carbon Dioxide and release Oxygen. Bacteria in the plants take in Zinc, and other trace elements and create new chemicals the plants need. Animals breathe oxygen and eat plants. And so it goes.

This - being one's true self - is not a limitation, because in all living organisms we see the same responsive ability, the ability to learn, which has been called ‘adaptation’,  that is foundational to the maintenance of the dynamic equilibrium of the processes of life. That responsive ability is biological empathy in action.


What we see in Nurturant Biology is an outcome that can best be described by the new word, Thrivival.

Thrivival goes beyond survival**.

Thriving, in relation to the human being, is that positive sense of well being that is inherent in the process of growth. Thriving, for the human being and for all mammals, originates in utero, and extends throughout life. Thriving applies to the individual, the family, the community, the society and to the environment from which all emerge.

Because this is a simple paradigm, and because it is an empathic paradigm, it will find expression in diverse ways, mirroring the diversity of the environment, the habitat, from micro to macro, leading to diversity in human expression of community and society.

The Nurturant Society is complex, and yet it is not at all complicated. This is the nature of nurturant empathy. The precise solutions emerge out of the experiential of each community.

*The consumer eats and does not seek to nurture anyone other than him or herself; for his or her eating is the penultimate act in the receipt of a service that the consumer has paid for, and having paid for it, the consumer does not trouble him or herself with the conditions within which the food was produced, or what happens to the by-products, but merely the presence of the food on the plate, it's appearance and taste, and other similar immediate considerations and the of course the price he or she has paid for the meal to be consumed. Quite often the consumer has no concept of what it takes to produce that end product on the plate. This because the human being, the citizen consumer, unlike every other living organism, is cut off from the source and the processes that create the food. Likewise the consumer is not concerned with what happens to that which is not eaten. It is considered waste, not food.

The 'consumer' is a dehumanising term which reduces each unique human being to an object to be crafted and then manipulated for profit. And for Power.

**Survival carries with it the sense of threat, the sense of scarcity. Whilst there exists the possibility of being eaten, for each individual, that does not in and of itself threaten any entire species, and what we see is that no predator nor herbivore will consume the entirety of that species which it eats.

Both prey and predator thrive in the natural state. The are interdependent, mutually nurturant. The struggle for survival is in fact a projection of the dynamic of fear that the Hierarchical, non-empathic Society feels, generates and promotes.

This is due to a fundamental undermining of natural empathy, which leads to disconnection, and with that insecurity arises, and the need to control follows and it is from this that violence flows.

Kindest regards


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Monday, 18 April 2011

Belgian Bishop claims abuse was 'a little game'

In an interview that aired Thursday last, Roger Vangheluwe, the former bishop of Bruges, spoke of his sexual abuse as "a little game," that involved fondling, but no "rough sex."

Huffington post and others reported on this.

These are my comments on the article, the dynamics of the sociopathic ex-Bishop and the current Belgian Bishop of  Tournai's comments to the press, and the dynmaics of Sociopathy in general.

Guaranteed, the former Bishop is lying. Attempting mitigation. He is also revelling in the attention. What it reveals is the sinister intent to manipulate, a sociopathic trait that makes people like him extremely dangerous. Indeed the world of celebrity politics is a world of sociopathy, charm, charisma, bluster, image.

However the comments made by the Bishop of Tournai reveal more of the Institutional Sociopathy of the Catholic Church.

Quote from the Huffington Post article : Guy Harpigny, the bishop of Tournai, said that, at a time when the church is reaching out to abuse victims, "along comes a former bishop who says it was only little games. This man is either sick, or it is a normal reaction from a pedophile."

This is another example of the sociopath at work. 

The Church is NOT reaching out to survivors and has in fact been engaged in a long term full scale offensive AGAINST survivors for many, many years, and has shown no signs of relenting. 

Pedohiles are not sick, they ARE nasty. Their actions are 100% Volitional. There is no reliable scientific evidence that supports they claim often made of the existance of some primary, uncontrollable urge.

Whilst it is important to understand the dynamics of abuse in that abuse is perpetuated through the generations by the denial of perpetrators, and by the lack of resolution of childhood trauma that is generalised throughout society, that dynamic is largely the result of the way in which Power is transmitted through Society, as Alice Miller and others such as David Smail, Carl Rogers, R D Laing and Noam Chomsky have pointed out, and it cannot ever be used in any way to mitigate the volitional reality of those actions that cause so much harm.

Thus the hint at 'sickness' is a deflection. An attempt to avoid responsibility. And as such, all attempts at avopiding responsibility for one's actions are immature, narccisstic and thus extremely dangerous.

It is how pedophiles react. It is how Tony Blair reacts to accusations that he is a murderer. It is how sociopaths react to being uncovered. I know this because, it is how I reacted, when as a parent I bullied my own children, slapped them, coerced them. And I had to face the full reality of my behaviour as being 100% volitional in order to deal with it. And deal with it I did.

Guy Harpigny's comments are designed to distance the Church from the comments made by Roger Vangheluwe, and to deflect attention from the Institutional Sociopathy which is well understood, well researched and absolutely at the core of this issue. Sociopaths will of course turn on each other of they cannot close ranks.

There are also degrees of Sociopathy.  The recent story of Irish Gardai joking about rape, and the actions of Dublin County Council Officials and others with regard to the avoidable and tragic death of Rachel Peavoy, and their behaviour and evidence given at the Coroners Inquest, are part of the generalised Sociopathy that Power Institutions and those who inhabit them rveal, time and time again. Likewise the refusal of the Irish DPP to prosecute a Priest who was accused by ten women in North Cork of serious sexual assault, which was only moved on after public pressure by a number of campaigners who made the matter public, and took it to the streets, in spite of legalistic threats by the DPP intended to deflect their efforts..

The willingness to avoid responsibility, to mitigate the adverse affects of their behaviours, to use manipulative mechanisms to deflect accountability ar all part of the Sociopathic mind-set.

This is something we all have to get to grips with.

And this report into Indigenous Residential/Boarding Schools systems looks how these systems were replicated all over the world, in many, many countries, for a long, long time.  The patterns of abuse of children show that there was awareness and a consistent policy of denil and cover-up, over such a long time, that suggest the abuse was intentional, was allowed as a process of destroying cultres by destroying their children. 

What is important to note is that these systems have not all been closed down, and where they have, we see a consistent pattern of increased Social Services 'interventions' targetting those populations that had previously been the targets of the Residential School Systems, with children being removed from their families and placed in care, into fostering or adoption programs, which turn out to be equally traumatic. This practice has been given a name. Psychopsema [psy•cho-pse-ma]

It's a clearly documented worldwide pattern : this is something we all have to get to grips with.

Kindest regards


Do what you love, it's Your Gift to Universe

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Saturday, 16 April 2011

On Anger, Reform and Diarmuid Martin in Ireland

Here's an article by John Allen, a reporter for the National Catholic Reporter, who met with Survivors outside the recent  Conference in Ireland, a the Jesuit Milltown Institute titled “Broken Faith: Revisioning the Church in Ireland. He listened attentively to what the survivors had to say, and was well informed, and cogniscant of much of the story. You can view that meeting here .

I read the article and the very first sentence drew the following response from me........

"Although the sexual abuse crisis has been devastating for the Catholic church everywhere it’s erupted, the meltdown in Ireland is fairly unique in scope and scale"

1. 'devastating for the church' : hmmmm compare that to the effects of the brutality and sexual abuse perpetrated upon those who Survived, and worse, on thos who did not Survive, whose pain was such that they committed suicide. And remember, that the Living Survivors are but the tip of the iceberg. There are many, many generations of dead who never spoke of their suffering, primarily because there was no one to hear it, no means to tell it such that it might have been understood or even believed.

2. 'erupted' : that's a violent word. It implies that the giving witness to what occurred was and is a violent act. That telling the truth is a violent act. What would Jesus say of this?

3. 'meltdown' again implies a catastrophe. How can the truth be considered a catastrophe, unless one wishes that the truth be suppressed?

4. "Ireland is fairly unique in scope and scale" : hmmm again, there are number of studies* of the world wide Residential Boarding School systems operated by the Church, set up by State Legislation, that show that the experience in Ireland is unique only in the most insignificant of ways. For example, there are or were no Aboriginal Residential Schools in Ireland. Just Industrial Schools for the poorest people.

It is also true that the sexual abuse of children occurred outside such Institutions, in Churches, Sacristies, Vicarages, Parish Halls, and even in the childrens own homes, and that this abuse was pretty widespread. In every country in the world where the Catholic (and other Religious denominations, to be fair) Church held some Power.

Thus even in the first sentence, the psychology of mitigation reveals itself.

Let me be clear here. This issue is a Societal issue. It is to do with the existence of Hierarchical Power, and the language and culture of violence that Hierarchical Power has always been associated with. While I will not mitigate in any way the responsibility of individuals or Institutions, I will not accept any analysis that stops short of the fullest acknowledgement of the truth of the matter.

The Dominant Cultures that comprise Industrial Civilisation are founded upon the Power to abuse and with that the ability and intent to mask that abuse, rationalise it or suppress awareness of it; be it by propaganda, indoctrination, by intimidation or by violence.

If Christianity - irrespective of what denomination, irrespective of it being evangelical, charismatic, ecclesiatic, had any moral or empathic compass,it would understand that Jesus was born into that same culture and spoke out, directly and with clarity, against that culture.

And the base of that culture's grip is this: the ability to abuse children, be it by gross and extreme acts which survivors are giving witness to or by the more subtle processes of indoctrination, propaganda and grooming which far too many people take as 'normal'.

The vast majority of pre-literate, 'uncivilised', aboriginal societies, which ranged in group size from small family groups to very large settlements, were and are empathic egalitarian societies, where the childs safety, well being and nurturance is paramount. They knew and know that the psychology of the future society is nurtured by how the society relates to and treats it's children, that empathy is the key to all healthy human relationships, and also key to a healthy relationship to the habitat, that empathy is key in an environment that has many variables, as do all natural environments, because empathy is responsive, rather than reactive.

The reactive nature of the Church Hierarchy speaks volumes. The fear that those who are of good heart who live within that Hierarchy must be very great indeed if thay feel they cannot speak out honestly and with passion against the crimes that have been committed within that Institution.

Diramuid Martin has a long, long way to go to meet the demands of empathic honesty. And the Institutions of the Christian Churches, and those of State Governance, even further.


*Here's a report prepared for the UN back in 1997 which is a brief comparative study of Indigenous Residential Schools operated by the Churches, legislated into being by State Governments, across the world.

Every continent apart from Antartica and the Artic has examples of this system, and in many places in Africa, South America and Asia, the systems and schools are still operating.

'Scope and scale indeed!

Kindest regards


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Friday, 15 April 2011

Martin: Church inquiry team to report to Pope by Easter

My letter in response :

A chara,

"Diarmuid Martin said the apostolic visitation appointed to help the catholic church in the wake of the clerical sex abuse crisis, has completed its work."

Again, the focus is on helping the Church, not the Survivors.... Helping the Church to do what?

'Manage the crisis'. As any Survivor will tell anyone who cares to listen, or whose heart is strong enough to feel or sense what it is like to be a Survivor of childhood sexual abuse or brutality perpetrated by Clergy in Institutions of 'care', the focus on managment of 'the crisis' wounds, and re-wounds all Survivors, because it is fundamentally dishonest and not about the Christian values of compassion, healing and nurturance, but about the non-christian values of Power and Status.

That anyone, be they clerics or Government Officials, can stand by and not act rapidly in the best interests of the Survivors, is a profound indictment of our Society.

The sad truth is that if it were not for the voices of Survivors, this would remain a secret even still.

Where are the good people of Ireland? Where are the good Christians?

Kindest regards


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Thursday, 7 April 2011

My Letter to the Chief Prosecutor at the ICC regarding the Charges Against The Pope

To : The Prosecutor
The International Criminal Court
Dr. Luis Moreno Ocampo
Maanweg 174
NL-2516 AB Den Haag
The Hague, The Netherlands

From : Corneilius Crowley

Regarding the Charges of Crimes Against Humanity, brought by two German Lawyers, Dr. jur. Christian Sailer and  Dr. jur. Gert-Joachim Hetzel  against  Dr. Josef Ratzinger, The Pope and Fiduciary Leader of the Roman Catholic Church :

1. the preservation and leadership of a worldwide totalitarian regime of coercion, which subjugates its members with terrifying and health-endangering threats,

2. the adherence to a fatal forbiddance of the use of condoms, even when the danger of HIV-AIDS infection exists, and

3. the establishment and maintenance of a worldwide system of cover-up of the sexual crimes committed by Catholic priests and their preferential treatment, which aids and abets ever new crimes.

I write to give witness to my own story with regard to the first and third charges.

Charge 1.

One of my earliest and most clear memories is of being left at a Convent Boarding School, called Killeshee, Which was operated by the La Sainte Union Nuns, at the age 5 and a half or so, dressed in sandals, socks, short pants, white shirt, a grey jumper, transfixed, terrified to my very core:

I am listening to a Nun who towers over me, as she reveals to me that there is a God who knows everything about me, that I was befouled with the stain of Original Sin, I was tainted by Adam and Eve’s transgression against God, and their weakness before the Devil in the form of The Snake, and that my very soul was eternally damned, and that unless I obey the Laws of God I would be cast forever into a burning tortured Hell.

She explains to me the meaning of venial sins and mortal sins, and their consequences with regard to the meaning of purgatory, of hell, of limbo. I do not understand the full meaning of her words, nonetheless I feel utter terror seep into my very core. I feel as if I am in peril.

She appears to me to be livid with rage, her face contorted, encased in her nuns habit, and to me she is as an immense and all powerful force, a dark brooding monolith standing above me and I felt that woman’s rage penetrate me as a complete body shock.

I froze. I was literally terrified rigid. The thought of hell seemed as real to me as her assumption of my sinfulness and guilt, my worthlessness as a person utterly proven.

I knew there was no escape, no possible salvation, and shame, guilt and fear surged through me,

I stayed frozen in that shock and fear for a long, long time.

I am standing in the back of a classroom, in the months that followed, ashamed and terrified, tears streaming down my faces, trying desperately to not move, trying not to not speak but I have to, so I stand out from my desk … because I have just defecated on myself, and there’s urine and faeces seeping out of my pants, running down my leg, onto my white socks, onto my brown sandals …

I am in a state of shock and I do not know what to do.

I am also excruciatingly embarrassed. And frightened. Terrified. I move, and the teacher, a nun notices the ‘disturbance’, and immediately starts shouting at me, she is disgusted with me and makes it plain for the entire room, the shame deepens as I become aware that they are all aware… ….. I am pulled and pushed out of the classroom, and I am made to stand outside the door. I wait.

Standing in my own faeces, encased in a stench of my own making, as I see it at that time.

I am the one who is to blame. I am the damned sinner. I wait. I shiver and await my punishment, utterly alone.

I write these words at age 52, after a life long struggle with low self esteem, a life long struggle with a background paranoia, that was largely instilled through the indoctrination processes I underwent in 5 Irish Catholic Boarding Schools, for 12 years. I still experience moments of sheer terror and paranoia, in spite of myself, in spite of knowing that these things happened in the past, are not happening now.

Back at Killeshee, 1966.

I am standing in purple frilly underwear, like a girls swim costume …. Only there are no girls, just boys and nuns. It’s sunny, and I am standing in the middle of a quadrangle, with children walking around me, jeering me, spitting at me. They are being directed to do so by an raging Nun, I am, like General Custer, surrounded on all sides. Unlike Custer there is no glory, I have no weapons, I cannot go down fighting. And I am feeling a visceral combination of obstinate silent rage and unutterable shame. Rage at my powerlessness, shame at my humiliation. This is what one Nun devised as a punishment. I do not recall what it was for, though I am told my brother, later on in life, that I fought quite a lot. Apparently I was a ‘troublesome’ boy. A ‘difficult’ child.

I am standing in a line-up, with other boys, and I am once again, silently terrified, and we young boys, at age 6 and 7, are standing on the polished wooden floor of our dormitory, which from memory included a wooden panelled hallway, leading to wooden panelled bathrooms and past a nuns bedroom, a room that was ‘guarding’ us.

I am in line, and I am holding up my underwear for inspection by a nun. There is a small poop mark on my underwear. An angry shrieking voice confirms my fears, and I get roughly pulled out of the line, I am slapped and publicly told off about the poop mark, shamed once more in front of everyone else; I am sent to wash my underwear…. This was a regular experience, and obviously, given my previous traumatic shitting experiences in class, I am being targeted – however at the time I don’t see it that way. I believe that the nuns are right and that I am wrong and I accept their judgement of me as defining me.

I am in a large assembly hall, with all the other boys. We are all wearing white arran jumpers and shorts. It’s a weekly gathering, it’s a Sunday. We are lined up in rows. The Nuns are listing the crimes of individual boys, and punishing them in public. Ritual humiliation for the benefit of our souls. MY name is called, and I am expected to walk up to nun at the front. I do so. She reads a piece of paper, she declares some offence I have committed, like a hanging judged, her loud pious and angry voice denouncing my crime to the entire assembly.

And then she gives me a sound beating with a cane, ten times or so, across my naked rear. I stifle my cries and try to not show any feeling… at age 6 I can master myself to mask the true emotions and feelings. After all this is for my own good.

I recall being totally convinced that, yes, there is a God, and that I was a sinner and damned and that no matter how ‘good’ I tried to be, I was doomed to endure Hell after death.

I lived in Fear for most of my life. Even when I rejected the teachings of Catholicism, the fear and paranoia remained.

I know now that these indoctrination practices are cruel, meditated, intentional and that the Hierarchy of The Church UNDERSTANDS the utility of these practices, and has done for a long, long time. That speaks to the criminality, the intentionality of these practices.

Charge 3.

I am in my bed and there is a priest at the end of my bed. I am in a cubicle. I am about 8 years old.

The priest, Father Murphy, or Murchu, the Irish version of his name, is my music teacher, and he is here, again, to question me. We have already had confrontations, because I wanted to try out ALL the instruments in the School Orchestra and of course that led to an altercation with him.

Father or was he a Brother, I can’t recall, Murchu/Murphy also teaches us swimming and PE. He was the one who threw me into the deep end of the swimming pool, fully clothed, plus my Pyjama bottoms, to ‘teach’ me how to swim, and how to save myself by removing my trousers and tieing the ends to make an air trap to support me. He forced me into the water, physically, after shouting at me and all this in front of the entire class and I was absolutely sure I was going to drown. I was being called a coward by this beastly man.

“Crowley, are ye a man or a mouse?” he says, with a barely disguised disgust. I know the routine.

If I answer ‘man’ he beats me for standing up to him, for being ‘cheeky’.

If I answer ‘mouse’ he beats me for being a coward.

This happens every few days for a few months. I tell no-one. There is no-one to tell. I am utterly alone.

This was typical of the mistreatment I endured throughout my time at these Boarding Schools. I was regularly assaulted by very exercised men, mostly clergy, who used a lot of force in administering punishments, most often with a ‘leather’ or with the cane, across my bare buttocks, or across my hands and wrists, or my knuckles. Occasionally I was struck on the side of the face with the hand, or on my legs. In class dusters, books, rulers, fists were used on a regular basis. All of this is brutal abuse.

I remember being in the room of a priest, Father Flood, he was the school bursar at Willow Park Preparatory School, the feed school for Blackrock College in Dublin.  His room is across a hallway from Father Stanley, who is the Head of the School. I have been in both priests rooms from time to time. These visits are deemed a privilege.

My trousers and pants are down and Father Flood is fondling my testicles and my penis….

He is smiling, sitting in his chair as I stand before him…. I am terrified,… I can see another boys penis and testicles, they are brown and smooth and I am sitting on Father Floods lap.. … but I don’t remember being in the room, the details of the room, and seeing the faces of the other boys… I just remember the smell of the room and the other boys  genitals. Father Flood takes my genitals and 'caresses' them smiling at me ... I don't understand what he is doing, I think it is a medical inspection, that’s what he tells me, I am about 9 years old.... I am unsure of what to do. Of course there is no-one to tell.

Fleeting memories haunt me from time to time:

This is a memory that still haunts me. It is all I can recall of this. Truth be told, it is all I want to recall of what happened. Something is shut down within me.

I am pretending to sleep in my bed. I am holding my breath. I am trying not to be here. I am petrified. I am trying to almost not breathe, because there are four dark shapes looming over me. Four priests, brothers, dressed in black cassocks. I can hear their breathing. I smell their breath. This is a boarding school. I am alone. This is a recurring memory. With it comes an existential fear, a wish for darkness, for silence. I have never been able to go beyond this point.

My hope is that it is merely a nightmare, and that nothing abusive occurred.

My story is but one of many. The details I have recollection of are, in many ways, far less traumatic or brutal than those witnessed and testified to by so many others of serious sexual assault, often with brutality, repeated over time, The truth is that the living Survivors who speak out are a tiny minority of the living witnesses who were assaulted, and that both these groups together are the tip of the iceberg that is ALL the children, across the Earth, who have been assaulted and abused within the confines of Institutional Church care, with the confines of their own homes and churches.

The truth is also that Dr. Ratziner was part of the committee that drew up the Crimens Solicitationis Document in 1962 that became the Churches Policy regard the handling of ‘allegations’ of Child Abuse. The suppression of knowledge of these crimes is a crime in and of itself, and the fact that the Vatican, it’s officials and Bishops all over the world complied with and perpetuated this suppression is a much larger crime, and deserves the title of a Crime Against Humanity.

The systemic abuse of children is also a Crime against Humanity.

I urge you to take this case forwards, to not only bring Josef Ratzinger to account for his actions, but to impress upon the Catholic Hierarchy their collective and individual responsibility to all Survivors, be they living or dead and to their families and communities where the adverse affects of these crimes continues to undermine psychological and physical well-being of real people.

Restorative Justice means that the full truth is told, such that all Survivors can tell their stories, be heard and understood and support in all ways possible to recover as best they can such that they can live without the stigma, pain, confusion, shame, low self-esteem and psychological distress that emerges as a direct consequence of abuse they have needlessly endured.

Yours Sincerely

Corneilius Crowley

Wednesday, 6 April 2011

Garda Rape 'Jokes' and the Abuse of Power: An open Letter to Media and Dail Eireann

 A Chara,

I wrote about the pervasive abuse of power in November 2009, in a letter published in the Irish Times.

This is part of what I wrote:

“the problem is best described as the abuse of power, in all its forms, from the personal to the institutional, for control or profit. Resolving this will protect children, and much more, in the future. It is linked in essence to all struggles for liberty, and must be at the heart of and visibly resolved in any decent, healthy society that dares to call itself decent.”

That call remains as clear today as it was when it was published.

The recent reports of Gardai ‘joking’ about raping a protestor are yet another warning sign.

Time and time again, we are seeing people in positions of Power and Responsibility engage in behaviour that fundamentally undermines their right to that position of power, that denies the meaning of the word ‘responsible’, that breaks asunder the sacred trusts inherent in positions of responsibility, that indicates that the issues this ‘incident’ highlights are still largely unresolved, and furthermore, that places all of Irelands people at risk.

Ireland cannot call itself a decent Society, until the denial stops, until the work of honesty, integrity and of restorative justice is underway. This is a matter of duty of care.

This the people of Ireland must recognise, and if those in positions of power and responsibility will not act, then the people have to. Or we too lose all credibility amongst the children of Ireland.

Yours sincerely

Corneilius Crowley

etc etc..

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Tuesday, 5 April 2011

URGENT ACTION ALERT! Charges Against The Pope for Crimes Against Humanity!

Two German lawyers, Christian Sailer and Gert Hetzel, have applied to the ICC prosecutor, Dr. Luis Moreno Ocampo, to begin the prosecution of the Pope as a German citizen who is complicit in crimes against humanity.


You can have a direct and real impact on the efforts to bring the Pope, Joseph Ratzinger, to trial at the International Criminal Court (ICC).

Here's how:

To make this happen, as many groups, individuals and survivors of church crimes as possible must IMMEDIATELY write to Dr. Ocampo and ask him to pursue charges against the Pope by supporting the Sailer-Hetzel application. The Prosecutor will decide by May 15 whether or not to pursue criminal proceedings against Ratzinger.

You can have a direct and real impact on the efforts to bring the Pope, Joseph Ratzinger, to trial at the International Criminal Court (ICC).

Here's how:


The Prosecutor
The International Criminal Court
Dr. Luis Moreno Ocampo
Maanweg 174
NL-2516 AB Den Haag
The Hague, The Netherlands

AND copy it to :

From these websites you will soon be able to go to the Spanish, Italian and French sites.

With my thanks, Do so before May 15! Have an impact!

We in The International Tribunal into Crimes of Church and State (ITCCS) fully support these two German lawyers and their application at the ICC. We call upon all our affiliates and supporters in every country to contact the lawyers and the ICC Prosecutor and immediately support the application to prosecute the Pope.

While it may seem improbable to many people that the ICC will bring these charges forward, it is also true to say that that improbability is increased if we, the Surviviors, our families and all other empathic people who understand the issues, and genuinely care for the well being of Survivors, and of all future children do not act on this. The probability that this case will move forwards therefore depends upon a massive public pressure, based not on hatred, or alternative allegiance, but on a cool and honest appraisal of the facts of the matter.

To Christians, and others of Religious Faiths, I say this : What would Jesus do?  Would he protect the children or would he protect the Pope and The Church?

Kindest regards


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